Left Alone
by kisshuismylife
Summary: Ichigo hurts Kisshu one time too many. Now, five years later, he's still gone, and Ichigo is still alone. Then she gets a chance to see him, but can she bring herself to take it? Written in first person, Ichigo's POV.


**Left Alone**

_**Flashback, Ichigo's POV: **__"Kisshu, just go away!" I yelled._

_Kisshu looked at me, and sighed. "Fine. I'll go away, but this time I won't come back. You've hurt me enough. I'll go find someone else, and you can stay here, alone, since I KNOW that kid dumped you." He turned his back on me and teleported, but not before Lettuce said, "That's torn it, Ichigo."_

_***End Flashback***_

_**Ichigo's POV: **_It has been five years since that incident, and I still regret it. I know I'll never see Kisshu again, no matter how much I want to. I know I hurt him, and though I'd like to apologize, I know it's too late. I'm too stubborn for my own good; everyone tells me that. And even if I do see Kisshu again, I probably can't convince him that I really do love him. He's stubborn too.

I'm out of school now, but I still live with my parents. I try to keep myself busy, with work and other things, but occasionally I can't push away my thoughts, and the pain of losing Kisshu. I quit Café Mew Mew a long time ago, but Lettuce, Pudding, and I still keep in touch. Pai and Taruto come back sometimes; more frequently now that Lettuce and Pudding are older. I think Pai's probably going to ask Lettuce to marry him at some point. I wish them luck.

I think Pai knows my feelings for Kisshu; he knows I'm still single, and I'm sure Lettuce has talked about it. Taruto's too wrapped up in Pudding to notice me, Pai, or anyone else for that matter. They're both still really energetic.

I think about asking Pai how Kisshu's doing, but in some ways, I don't want to know. For all I know, he's got a girlfriend or even a wife now. Finding that out for sure would probably kill me.

I hear the doorbell ring, and my mom opening it. To my surprise, she calls, "Ichigo, Pai's here, and he wants to talk with you!"

I run downstairs, and see Pai standing in the front hall. "Hi Pai," I say. "How's it going?"

"Things are going well, I actually just came back to Earth after a visit to my family," Pai said. "That's what I wanted to talk about; can we go to your room?"

"I thought you were afraid of it," I tease him.

"Don't listen to Taruto; I got over that a while ago," Pai says.

"Alright," I say, and lead the way upstairs. "You can sit down wherever," I tell him when we get to my room. I close the door as he sits in my desk chair, and I sit on the bed. "So what did you want to talk about?" I ask.

Pai sighs. "I talked with Kisshu on my last visit," he said. "And while I shouldn't be telling you this, I'm going to anyways."

This perks my interest, and Pai says, "Kisshu has been pretty much single since he left you. He dated a few girls, but always in the end said he couldn't handle a long-term relationship. Part of it is that there aren't many female warriors, and the ones who aren't warriors don't love Kisshu for who he is; they love him because he's good-looking and famous. It's the equivalent of fangirls on this planet. He's gone out with a few, but always breaks it off after a few weeks or months. I think that the reason he won't stay in a relationship is that none of them measure up to you."

"Me?" I ask.

"You were Kisshu's first love," Pai says. "Part of what's going on now is that Kisshu wants to find someone like you- but he's realized that you're one-of-a-kind. He's getting sad about it, but I think he's too stubborn to admit he should come back and see you. I have an offer for you, though. Lettuce is coming back with me tomorrow to meet my parents; I came to ask if you would come too."

"I'd love to, but is it a good idea?" I ask.

"I think you're the only one who can get Kisshu back to normal," Pai said. "I already informed your mother and my parents, and my parents won't tell Kisshu. Your mom agreed to me taking you with Lettuce, so I'd suggest that you start packing. We'll be there for two weeks."

"Thanks, Pai," I say.

Pai smiles. "Sure," he says. "I'll leave you to start packing, and I'll tell your mom you agreed. We're leaving at ten in the morning."

"Thanks," I say.

Pai nods and leaves as I start picking out clothes.

By the next morning, I'm ready to go- and pretty nervous. I hear the doorbell ring, and run to get it. It's Pai, and he asks, "Are you ready?"

I grab my suitcase and say, "Yes." Pai takes my free hand and teleports to his ship.

Lettuce is waiting in the main room for us, and she greets me. "Hi Lettuce," I say. "How are you?"

"Good," Lettuce says. "I can show you where we're going to be while Pai flies the ship."

"K," I say. Pai teleports off as Lettuce leads me to a large bedroom. I set my suitcase down, and watch as Lettuce sits on the bed.

"Ichigo, come sit down," she says.

I obey, and Lettuce sighs. "You're nervous, aren't you?" she asks.

"That obvious?" I ask.

"To those of us who know you, yes," Lettuce said. "I can't say that I'm not nervous, but we'll just have to do our best not to show it."

We feel the ship jolt and start to move, and Lettuce asks, "Ichigo, will you be able to handle it if Kisshu truly has no feelings for you?"

"Most likely- no," I say gloomily. "I can handle it if he just wants to be friends, even though that would probably hurt too. But if he still hates me, I don't think I'll be able to live anymore. You know what it was like right after he left. The pain's faded a bit, but if we get there and I find out he still hates me, you'll most likely be taking my body back instead of me."

Lettuce sighs again. "We'll try to make sure that doesn't happen," she says. "I don't want Pai to get killed by your dad."

I sigh too, and we sit in silence for a while. Eventually the movement of the ship puts us both to sleep.

I wake up a while later to someone shaking me. I open my eyes, and see Lettuce. "We're here," she says.

I get up and straighten my hair and clothes, then grab my suitcase as Pai teleports in. "Are you both ready?" he asks.

Lettuce and I nod, and Pai takes our free hands and teleports to the front of what looks like a huge mansion. "Pai, is this where you live?" Lettuce asks.

"Yeah," Pai says, sounding a bit awkward. He goes up to the door and opens it, then motions to us to follow him. We follow him in, and he closes the door behind us. We hear teleportation, and a woman who resembles Taruto appears. "Oh, Pai, you're back!" she says happily.

"Hi Mom," Pai says. "Mom, this is my fiancé, Midorikawa Lettuce, and her friend Momomiya Ichigo, aka Mew Lettuce and Mew Ichigo."

I notice Pai's mother's eyes widen a bit when she hears my name, and then she says, "It's nice to meet both of you, girls. You can both call me Yuki."

"Thank you," Lettuce and I say, bowing slightly. "It's nice to meet you too."

Yuki smiles and asks, "Pai, did you bring Ichigo here to see Kisshu?"

"Yes," Pai said. "I thought it was time, and I've known for a while that Ichigo misses him."

"I'm sure you're right," Yuki says. "Kisshu's in his room, but let's get the girls settled first, okay?"

"Okay," Pai says. "Are they in separate rooms, or sharing?"

"I decided to have them share, and they've got their own bathroom," Yuki says. "But Lettuce is welcome to share with you if she chooses to."

Lettuce blushes, and I smile at her. "Come on girls, I'll show you your room," Yuki says. "Pai, go let your dad know you're back, but don't let Kisshu know yet."

"K," Pai says, and teleports off. Yuki leads us down the hall to a huge room, with two queen-size beds, and two walk-in closets. Yuki giggles at our expressions and says, "The bathroom is through here, and I'll let you get settled in. Pai should be back shortly, though, so don't feel that you need to unpack all at once."

"Alright, thanks Yuki," I say. Lettuce adds her thanks as well, and Yuki smiles, then teleports out.

Lettuce and I start unpacking. Five minutes later, though, Pai knocks on the open door, and asks, "Ichigo, will you come with me?"

"Hai," I say.

Pai looks at Lettuce, and says, "Lettuce-chan, I'll be back, k?"

"K," Lettuce said. "Ichigo, good luck."

"Thanks, Lettuce," I say. Then Pai takes my shoulder, and teleports to a closed door. I feel nervous, and Pai says softly, "Don't worry, I think it'll be fine- and if it's not, just tell me, k?"

"K," I say nervously.

Pai knocks on the door, and I catch my breath as Kisshu's voice calls, "Who is it?"

"It's Pai, can you open up?" Pai calls back.

We hear footsteps, and then the door opens. Kisshu's standing in front of me, and he looks shocked. He also looks about ten times hotter than the last time I saw him. He still has those beautiful golden eyes, but his hair is a bit longer, and tied into a single ponytail. He's wearing long black pants, and a dark green t-shirt, which is a bit loose, but still shows off the fact that he's put on a bit more muscle than the last time I saw him.

"Ichigo?" he asks softly.

"Hi Kisshu," I say, a bit uncertain.

"Why are you here?" Kisshu asks.

I can't really tell if he's mad or not, but I just say, "I wanted to see you, so when Pai said he was taking Lettuce to meet his family, and asked if I wanted to come, I said yes."

Kisshu looks at Pai, puzzled, and Pai says, "I had to do SOMETHING. You've been moping for ages, and Ichigo's been moping for five years, so I figured I'd just take her here. I probably would have dragged her here if she hadn't said yes."

"That would be counterintuitive," Kisshu says.

"Then aren't you glad she said yes?" Pai asked.

Kisshu looks back at me, and asks, "Were you really moping for five years?"

"Pretty much, yeah," I say. "Although the first two years were more crying than the next three."

"I'll leave you two alone, I'm going back to Lettuce," Pai says, and teleports off.

Kisshu looks at me, and asks, "Are you coming in?"

I look at him, and he motions for me to come in. I do so, and he closes the door behind us. Then he turns back to me, and asks, "Why were you crying?"

I sigh. "I couldn't take how much I hurt you," I say softly. "You were right all along, I should have gone with you rather than the treehugger, and I lived with the consequences of my actions for five years."

"Didn't Blondie love you?" Kisshu asks.

"I never loved him, but yes," I say. "I spent an insane amount of effort to get him and Mint together, and they've been together for two years now. They're perfect for each other; snobby rich people."

To my surprise, Kisshu laughs. It fades quickly, though, and he asks, "Ichigo, do you love me?"

"Yes," I say without hesitation. "I know I realized it too late, and I really wanted to apologize, but I never got the chance until Pai said I could come see you, and I jumped at the chance. I don't blame you if you still hate me, but I realized after about two weeks of not seeing you that I really can't live without you. I've been single for five years, because I knew I would only ever love you, even though I knew you probably still hated me."

What Kisshu says next shocks me. "I never hated you," he says. "I was angry, but I never hated you. I was just too stubborn to come back. And I didn't really know whether or not you'd changed."

"I changed in the first two days after you left," I say softly. "By the end of the second week, I had realized I was actually head over heels in love with you, and that's when I started crying all the time. I realized killing myself wouldn't help, so I never tried that, but I was crying almost every day, several times a day for two years. I think I eventually lost the ability to cry."

"I'm sorry," Kisshu says.

"It's not your fault," I say. "It's my own. If I hadn't been so awful to you, this wouldn't have happened, and maybe we would be together, like Pai and Lettuce."

"Would you like that?" Kisshu asks. "Being together?"

"I would love that," I say.

Kisshu smirks, that smirk I missed for so long, and says, "Then let's be together, Koneko-chan."

I smile, happier than I've been in years, and say, "This is a dream come true, Kish."

**Alright, there's another one! This could be continued, but I'm not sure yet. Let me know what you think, and please don't flame.**


End file.
